A Tunisian family weekend

Last weekend was certainly an interesting experience. We were not told who we would be spending the weekend with until they showed up on Friday. I was staying with the average Tunisian family - a mother, a father, a 17 year old daughter (Ines), a 14 year old son, and a 6 year old daughter. (They also had a live-in maid). They lived in a typical Tunisian family compound - Ines' maternal uncle lived above them, her grandmother lived next to them, her paternal uncle lived above her grandmother. Maggie, another student in the program, was staying with the family of the maternal aunt, who lived about a kilometer away. I was pretty much entertainment for the 17 year old, who considered me her American doll for the weekend. Her 18 year old cousin Siwar had had an American student last semester, and now it was her turn too. She showed me to all her friends and everything.

Unfortunately the family spoke no English, which is a problem because I don't speak Arabic. However, they did speak French. I got by pretty well, except for the mother, who didn't speak proper French and had a heavy accent.

Maggie and I were picked up by my host mother, Ines, and Maggie's host sister, Siwar, and were taken to Ariana, a suburb of Tunis. The weekend was great because I got to see a lot of Tunis - we went to Carthage on Saturday, and the Bardo (museum with half of the mosaics in the world).

I'd like to share a few thoughts on the Tunisian family:

It is customary to feed guests, and it is considered an insult if they refuse. As a result, I was eating every hour all weekend. To make things a bit more difficult, I wasn't allowed to serve my own plate. There was pretty much no way for me to eat everything they gave me. I had chicken couscous, salad mechouia, fried salad, Tunisian baklava, Lebanese baklava, a variety of juices, a fried pancake thing that reminded me of beignets, and the list goes on and on. It was great to finally be eating somewhere that wasn't a restaurant, but there was just sooo much food.

My host mother wore a hijab. However, since I was a female, she didn't wear a hijab in the house. In fact, she did not wear much at all - a very light, low cut, short, house dress. This is just another example of the difference between how women act outside the house and inside the house. Ines did not wear a hijab. Ines claimed she did not pray or follow Islam except for Ramadan.

This brings me to Saturday night. I had the expression that Maggie, Ines, Siwar, and I were going out with another friend named Miriam for the evening. We were told we were going to a teahouse on Le Lac. It turns out that we were being used as an excuse for the girls to go out with their secret boyfriends. Wow. In fact, Miriam was meeting her boyfriend for the second time (ever), who was 23 (she was 17), and whom she'd met on the internet. I guess the expectation is that the girls will not go and spend time with boys, so their mothers don't think to question what they are up to.

Everyone in Tunisian holds hands. This made me feel very uncomfortable all weekend, as I was expected to hold Ines' hand while walking around all weekend. In fact, when I crossed the street, everyone held their hands out to me to help me cross. I felt like a five year old again. I was also kissed by so many people that I couldn't keep track. Relatives walked in and out of the house, and of course wanted to meet the American. Because of the separation of the sexes, girls only hold hands with girls, and guys with guys. In fact, it is common to see guys with their arms around each other on the street, giving each other kisses. As an American, this seems particularly strange to me.

Some interesting ideas from the weekend:
1) Obama is Mulsim. That is why the Arab world wants him to win. But it will be hard for him because Americans hate Muslims.
2) The Jews in America control the American economy.
3) I must have snuck out of my house all the time as a teenager and done lots of drugs and alcohol because I am American.
I'll add more as I think of them...

By the end of the weekend (in which I'd managed to do a lot), I was ready to return to my own bed in the hotel (I felt bad because I'd stolen the six year old daughter's bed for the weekend). However, they were not ready for me to return. I had to tell them that I had tutoring at the hotel, so they would take me back. They wanted me to stay and return every weekend. In fact, I even got invited to a dance party with Ines this weekend (not going because I don't want to/am going to Kairouan).

Even if it was a bit overwhelming, I did have an enjoyable weekend. The family couldn't have been nicer, and I plan to go to Sidi Bou Said with Ines later in July.